I’m Going Back to Minnesota Where Sadness Makes Sense

By Danez Smith

O California, don't you know the sun is only a god
if you learn to starve for him! I'm bored with the ocean
I stood at the lip of it, dressed in down, praying for snow
I know, I'm strange, too much light makes me nervous
at least in this land where the trees always bear green.
I know something that doesn't die can't be beautiful.
Have you ever stood on a frozen lake, California?
The sun above you, the snow & stalled sea -- a field of mirror
all demanding to be the sun too, everything around you 
is light & it's gorgeous & if you stay too long it will kill you
& it's sad, you know? You're the only warm thing for miles
& the only thing that can't shine.